There goes the solar system
I moved to Mars to get away from incessant noise.
Actually, that was also why I first moved to Northwest Gardnerville, thinking it was a remote desert town. Big mistake. I moved there before the formerly sleepy Carson Valley Inn and Casino was discovered by the retro-loving hipsters and the country music set. This town is not exactly Vegas, but it doesn’t have to be to exceed my noise tolerance. While I welcome the end of the pandemic, I just know that starting with the summer concert series featuring Tanya Tucker, against whom I have no beef save for the crowds she attracts, this place is about to become Noise City, USA.
I could almost take it, except the casino offers sporting clays. For those who don’t recognize the term, it refers to shooting ceramics out of the sky. With shotguns. As a side note, even if they made silencers for shotguns, I doubt anyone would use them. As with loud pipes on motorcycles, the noise of shotguns is half (or more) the fun for the participants.
Oh, and the noise of aircraft. “Don’t move near an airport” is the common response to this complaint. Well, I didn’t exactly move right next to one. But who knew that between the crowds flying into the casino, and this area becoming a “soaring” and skydiving destination, that little old Minden-Tahoe Airport would fill our skies with air traffic like something out of the pre-yippie-ki-yay finale of Die Hard 2?
Hence my move to Mars, where the skies were blessedly empty, and it was blessedly quiet.
Emphasis on “were” and also on “was.”
The other day I fell out of my bunk, rousted from sleep by a nightmare that I was back in noisy Gardnerville. But no, it was just NASA’s new little darling, the ‘copter called Ingenuity, out there flying pointlessly up a few meters (we’re metric here) and dropping back down. Not entirely pointlessly, though, because the Perseverance rover was also scooting about and the two were taking photos of each other from various distances. The rover’s servo motors, and the aircraft’s chopper blades would fit right into the ambience of my old home too close to the casino and the airport.
Was exporting this annoying noisemaking device to another planet the highest and best use of tax money? And did they have to put it right in my crater? Don’t accuse me of NIMBY-ism; I moved to Mars, for gosh sake. And don’t talk to me about zoning. I was here first.
At least NASA hasn’t sent up any country vixens or robots that shoot sporting clays.
Jezero Crater, Mars
Formerly of Gardnerville
A gaggle of gables
Over a decade ago when my husband and I were considering building a house in Fish Springs, we discovered that the county building code requires “3 or more gable ends and building offsets recessed/alcove or similar features” (Building Codes and Design Criteria; Single Family Dwelling Design per title 20.6090.030(Z). That turned us off to that idea, yet we were able to find a lovely 1970s vintage bungalow in Johnson Lane, with only two roof lines, that continues to bring us joy.
What I find as I drive around East Valley is an astonishing effect of this design requirement. On most newly-built homes, I counted at least six various roof lines per house. And that was just what I could see from the street. There is a structure being erected as I write this that has a plethora of gables, cornices, split roof levels, and even a turret. Today, I spotted some sort of whateveritwas going up on the center of the roof and asked myself, "what in the … world is that? And what in the … world is it for?"
Any sane, intelligent architect would hopefully follow the old rule that "design follows function." The function of many of these features eludes me. Most of these bits of architectural silliness appear to be a competition inspired by the Winchester Mystery House in San Jose, Calif. While three such design features adds interest, anything beyond that becomes ridiculous and adds to the cost of building the home.
Can the Planning Department please rethink this particular rule in the code? With the cost of building permits, materials, and taxes, no wonder it takes nearly $500K just to buy a condo around here. When does the next housing bubble crash happen? Only then will our children be able to buy into this market, and if employers want locals to work in their businesses and factories, this is only a small portion of the problem that needs to be solved. Whatever the purpose for this inane rule, it's leading to "excessive variety," which the Planning Department says in their codes that they're trying to avoid.
Sanctuary state a whole can of worms
My understanding is that some members of our state Legislature are pushing to make Nevada a sanctuary state just like our neighbor to the west, California. I realize that its important for illegals who have witnessed a crime to cooperate with local law enforcement to help in any way they can to see that justice is served but becoming a sanctuary state opens a whole new can of worms, just ask Kate Steinle (I wish she was still alive to answer the question).
It would make more sense to pass a law wherein law enforcement can’t ask a question with relation to a witness’s place of birth or ethnic origin unless it is directly related to the solving of a crime. Much like the Miranda Rights Act a witness would not be required to divulge information to law enforcement other than what is required to identify or help capture a perpetrator of a crime.
I am a staunch supporter of federal, state, and local police in the performance of their duties to protect us from the criminal element in our society but asking for information about a witness that has no bearing on the case is beyond their pay grade.